yeup

to be honest.things arent the same.and they will never be.that can be good and bad and right now its bad.well for me that is.and idk i just cant seem to talk to anyone about this because they just dont seem to like understand.yeah i mean the advice you eople gave me was good but its the same shit..i needa still hear that real as shit that will just make me wonder and think real hard to change my whole attitude about all this.this whole stuation is bad for you to dont think its not..you may not be noticing it but once i adjust to this and like start changing how i am about this all this shit..idk how anything will be in the end.to be completely honest…idk things just better change because this isnt good at all.so yeah idk.im not getting my hope up for anything anymore.im not expectin anything anymore.im not going to fix try and fix anything.and if this thing doesnt go 50/50 then im not trying nomore either.plain and simple..and so fr this thing isnt 50/50 so yeah im justbeing honest here because yeah i dont want to feel and look dumb as fuck right now or nothing.but whatever there it goes..think what you want about me being emo or sensative or to emotionall.oh fuckin well

p.s.:hope your lifestyle doesnt change…

-cesar

no time for me.me waiting and looking at my phone every second to see if i get a tex or a call.im here waiting like im a hungry dog waiting to be fed.and my minds just running wild and making me crazy.i not happy to be honest im miserable.i cant look at the brightside like everyone keeps telling me.they dont know.they cant give advice on something that theyve never been through.i need different advice.i cant handle this like fuck.i didnt think this would be that hard.

idk what ima do if its going to be like this a majority of the time…

you just dont know either..you really dont.even if i explain you dont know.so i wont even bother explaing this to anyone.ill just have to adjust if i can..

i just dont know…

ima have myself a good cry..then go to sleep..

sounds like a plan mhmm

for you to.soo your not miserable and depressed..cause i know how how you wanna leave.and once you leave you wont look back all that much

am not going to go out as much anymore.i need to manage my time more on whats important and not focus more on missing out on certain stuff.i didnt realize what i was doing until now since you told me.i just idk..i guess i was just fuckin up.but ima change all that sacrafice everything social to make you happy..idc if i lose friends or anyting..cause you are way more important..

yeah..

im not tired or drained or sleepy i feel quite good to be honest.i feel l i might do to lol but ill see if to lazy or not lol.but yeah idk lately ive been thinking soo much and idk what im even thinking about anymore.its good things and bad and just like wtf kinda shiet and idk who i can just fully explain this to because idk if anyone would have the patience to wait for me to explain everything ive got to say..ideven know if i got a lot to say..see lol im already confusing myself haha.but w.e. ill prolly find a good way to actually use my tumblr..i dont really put up and picture or stuff..well guess ill go find something to do for now`

how times going by fast..im not looking forward to the coming days and stuff but oh well what can i do?not like i have magical powers